2010

First I want to apologise to you all for abandoning this blog so abruptly without no further word to you all. I also want to thank everyone who has enquired about me and wanting to know if I am ok.
I stopped writing the blog as I wanted a complete break. My last scan showed that there was no change to the cancer in my hip and that the suspected cancer in my chest was still growing but slowly. I needed to get away from anything cancer related..blogs, websites..at one stage I was visiting some cancer pags 5-6 times a day. Not healthy for me. So I have had a complete break.
Now I am back!..to bore you all again! The three of us had the summer that we longed for..cornwall was blissful..we had great plans for the fortnight but ended up spending all the days relaxing on the beach. The other major change to our lives was that we adopted from a rescue a 12 week old puppy called Minnie. We thought long and hard about getting another dog after Chloe died as its such a major long term commitment (And thats something we have tended to shy away from). Wow what a change to our lives..its just like having a baby in the house. Its been wonderful to have something positive in our lives..its especially been wonderful for Christopher to have something to love
Well what will 2010 bring for me...A huge change is that I am being handed over to another consultant. The hospital are referring everyone with metastic involvement to new doctor who has just been hired. I am nervous of going to see someone new..Dr Tinkler has been with me since diagnose so I have learnt to rely on her support..I am pretty selfish about my medical professionals..I like to see the same person be it GP, Nurse or consultant so this will be a hard thing. Before I go to see him I am getting ready for my followup scans..this time they are on 12/13th January. Hopefully the results will follow in time for my consultants appoint ment on January 21st. My main problem is exhaustion these days. I hate the fact that I cannot do things that I long to do. The exhaustion is much more that it was last year and the year before.I also feel bad when I see how much pressure there is on Gordon as main wage earner and carer to me..I am sure that the last thing he wants to do is come in and start looking after a poorly wife after a hard day at work. He is back in London now so cannot come home as quickly as he used to..He tries not to complain but I can see how hard this all is on him. Christopher is an angel..loving, caring to me. This year it will be important for him as we have to choose a secondary school for him..I want to make the right choice for him
So just to let everyone know...i am fine..very tired, apprehensive at times as to whether I am deteriorating health wise..A ticking time bomb i think!