I am very sad to say that today we have had to put our lovely dog Chloe to sleep. She was 17 yrs old and had been with her since she was 4. She had gone downhill quite fast recently and was obviously suffering. The vet said she also had the start of liver failure so we decided very sadly that the kindest thing to do was to put her to sleep
Have shed lots of tears with Gordon and Chris...Chloe was part of our family and we shall miss her so much.
Things are not so good...Still having problems with Chris and I am also very low and depressed as well. I am so looking forward to the Easter Holidays.
Will post more when my spirits are higher
Monday, 30 March 2009
Sunday, 22 March 2009
Christopher
Sorry for not posting recently but things went down hill with Christopher after my last post. I went to school on the thursday to collect him to find him crying in the corridor. Saw the teacher and found out that Christopher had kicked him. Felt awful and that we were failing him as parents. I went in the next day and saw his class teacher who told me that his behaviour in class had also got worse. He's been bursting into tears and getting stressed over simple things. Me and Gordon didn't know what to think or say
He has never had counselling or emotional support at school. Every time something changes with me I go in and update them but they have never ever bothered to talk to him. But surprise surprise..this week after he had kicked the music teacher he was called out of lessons to talk about his ''problems''. We are not happy about this as calling it this seems to us that he is being labelled as a troublemaker.
I have managed to talk to Chris on a one to one basis to find out why he was behaving like this. The reason behind it all was that he had seen the house being adapted with rails etc and thought I had got worse and I had not told him. He had been worrying so much that i had deteriorated. I couldn't believe it...such a simple thing but so important to him. He said 'mum are you going to die?'..well everyone dies one day. We talked about my condition and I said that I was doing all the right things by taking medicine and that the Dr was pleased with me. Poor lad, he was worrying so much about me. Talking has helped as this week he has been behaving so much better so fingers crossed. I have asked him to talk to me when things are bothering him and not to bottle it up inside..I hope he does.
Had a wonderful mothers day. We went to a hotel for lunch with Mum and Dad,my grandad, my sister, brother in law and my neice. Food was lovely and I had a bottle of prosecco all to myself. There was a childrens entertainer which the kids loved and it ment the sdults could enjoy their food and relax. I got flowers from my parents, flowers from Chris and a lovely mirror for my dressing table. ALso two cards hand made by Chris filled with lots of love. Its been a lovely day.
He has never had counselling or emotional support at school. Every time something changes with me I go in and update them but they have never ever bothered to talk to him. But surprise surprise..this week after he had kicked the music teacher he was called out of lessons to talk about his ''problems''. We are not happy about this as calling it this seems to us that he is being labelled as a troublemaker.
I have managed to talk to Chris on a one to one basis to find out why he was behaving like this. The reason behind it all was that he had seen the house being adapted with rails etc and thought I had got worse and I had not told him. He had been worrying so much that i had deteriorated. I couldn't believe it...such a simple thing but so important to him. He said 'mum are you going to die?'..well everyone dies one day. We talked about my condition and I said that I was doing all the right things by taking medicine and that the Dr was pleased with me. Poor lad, he was worrying so much about me. Talking has helped as this week he has been behaving so much better so fingers crossed. I have asked him to talk to me when things are bothering him and not to bottle it up inside..I hope he does.
Had a wonderful mothers day. We went to a hotel for lunch with Mum and Dad,my grandad, my sister, brother in law and my neice. Food was lovely and I had a bottle of prosecco all to myself. There was a childrens entertainer which the kids loved and it ment the sdults could enjoy their food and relax. I got flowers from my parents, flowers from Chris and a lovely mirror for my dressing table. ALso two cards hand made by Chris filled with lots of love. Its been a lovely day.
Monday, 9 March 2009
Falling asleep/Always check who is behind you!!
Can't believe how tired I am today. Fell asleep when I got back from the school run, and then again at the hospice and then AGAIN when I got back from school. The third time I think that I would have slept all evening if it had not been for Christopher shaking me and telling me he was hungry.
Had to have words with one of his teachers today as the teacher was really picking on Chris and calling him names. Note to teacher -do NOT bad mouth my son! And always check behind you before you insult someone. The look of shock on his face as he turned round and saw me after he insulted Chris was priceless. I am surprised that Chris wanted to continue with the school club but he was prepared to give it another go. He tries really hard at running -its not his fault that he is not as fast as the boys. Very proud of him.
Managed to get some gardening done between the rain. Got to spread compost etc over the vegetable plot and then it will be ready for planting seeds. Gordon built a fence around it so Chloe wouldn't walk over it -shes driving me mad walking mud into the house. Just got to also move the compost heap and get an outside bin. Am really enjoying doing this with Gordon as its something we can both do together
Had to have words with one of his teachers today as the teacher was really picking on Chris and calling him names. Note to teacher -do NOT bad mouth my son! And always check behind you before you insult someone. The look of shock on his face as he turned round and saw me after he insulted Chris was priceless. I am surprised that Chris wanted to continue with the school club but he was prepared to give it another go. He tries really hard at running -its not his fault that he is not as fast as the boys. Very proud of him.
Managed to get some gardening done between the rain. Got to spread compost etc over the vegetable plot and then it will be ready for planting seeds. Gordon built a fence around it so Chloe wouldn't walk over it -shes driving me mad walking mud into the house. Just got to also move the compost heap and get an outside bin. Am really enjoying doing this with Gordon as its something we can both do together
Sunday, 8 March 2009
Veg Plot
Gordon and Keith painted my bedroom which looks wonderful. I also managed to get down to Ikea to buy some lovely accessories. The room is now a true sanctuary to me and I feel really chilled out when I am in it. I also bought an armchair to put in it so that visitors have somewhere to sit when they come to see me.
Usual busy week -I went into the infant school twice to get some idea of what the work will be like and I start officially on Wednesday. Looking forward to it.
Friday I went out to dinner with some friends from BAOS (Operatic society). We went out to remember our friend Carol who died suddenly last month. A few tears were shed as well as lots of alchohol!. On Saturday I went to Sing a Long a Hairspray with my neighbour Judith. We had a great time. We dressed up -I wore a full circle net petticoat, a navy skirt, navy checked blouse, pink cardy, pink scarf and headband. We laughed at Judith's daughter and her friend who had used toilet rolls to make their hair go into a bee hive. It was a great night -we were singing and dancing all evening. I was disappointed though that not many people dressed up -where were their sense of fun?
Have had a busy weekend in the garden. Last year we had a small vegetable plot and had quite a successful harvest. So this year we have decided to make a bigger plot -its now about 8 times the size of our original plot.Unfortunately the bad weather stopped us today from doing much so hoping for some nice days in the week so that I can get some more work done on the plot ready for planting. I am so grateful to Gordon who did most of the hard work doing the digging. He takes my dreams and makes them into reality
Usual busy week -I went into the infant school twice to get some idea of what the work will be like and I start officially on Wednesday. Looking forward to it.
Friday I went out to dinner with some friends from BAOS (Operatic society). We went out to remember our friend Carol who died suddenly last month. A few tears were shed as well as lots of alchohol!. On Saturday I went to Sing a Long a Hairspray with my neighbour Judith. We had a great time. We dressed up -I wore a full circle net petticoat, a navy skirt, navy checked blouse, pink cardy, pink scarf and headband. We laughed at Judith's daughter and her friend who had used toilet rolls to make their hair go into a bee hive. It was a great night -we were singing and dancing all evening. I was disappointed though that not many people dressed up -where were their sense of fun?
Have had a busy weekend in the garden. Last year we had a small vegetable plot and had quite a successful harvest. So this year we have decided to make a bigger plot -its now about 8 times the size of our original plot.Unfortunately the bad weather stopped us today from doing much so hoping for some nice days in the week so that I can get some more work done on the plot ready for planting. I am so grateful to Gordon who did most of the hard work doing the digging. He takes my dreams and makes them into reality
Saturday, 28 February 2009
Creating a sanctuary
Recently due to the fact that tire so easily and that some days suffer quite badly from pain. I have noticed a deterioration in my health since last September especially with regard to energy levels. By 8pm I am often to be found tucked up in bed as its were I am at my most comfortable. I also feel that this is a room that I will be spending more and more time over the next few years so it has become important to me to make it nice and be a place where people can visit me when I am unable to get out of bed..or even when I am just too tired and want company.
We don't have too much money so need to use what furniture I have and in time slowly replace them. ALso trying to cut down on clutter and just have the things that mean the most to me... Christophers stories, candles, my favourite books, my jewelry.
We went out today and bought the paint to get started hopefully tomorrow. I couldn't afford to replace my curtains as they are very expensive so have taken the colour schemes from them. They are cream red and olive. SO we have decided to paint one wall as a feature wall in 'overtly olive'. The rest of the walls will be daffodil white. Gordon bought me a wonderful candlelabra for the bedroom which is so gorgous.I am really looking forward to see it all done and create a 'true sanctuary' for me. I hope to post photos once its finished. Going to sign off now as I am falling asleep.
We don't have too much money so need to use what furniture I have and in time slowly replace them. ALso trying to cut down on clutter and just have the things that mean the most to me... Christophers stories, candles, my favourite books, my jewelry.
We went out today and bought the paint to get started hopefully tomorrow. I couldn't afford to replace my curtains as they are very expensive so have taken the colour schemes from them. They are cream red and olive. SO we have decided to paint one wall as a feature wall in 'overtly olive'. The rest of the walls will be daffodil white. Gordon bought me a wonderful candlelabra for the bedroom which is so gorgous.I am really looking forward to see it all done and create a 'true sanctuary' for me. I hope to post photos once its finished. Going to sign off now as I am falling asleep.
A new Job and a Party
Its been a busy week. I'm trying to spread the housework tasks across the week so I don't get too tired during the day.
I am excited that I have managed to get a job. My friend works as a dinner lady at the local infant school. She's just got a new job and asked me if I wanted to work the two days that she cannot do -Wednesdays and Fridays. Just one hour on the those days. This will be lovely and just enough. Unlike my previous attempt at doing this I will be contracted to do just those two days. It means i get to work with children again which is something i love. One day I will be working with a downs syndrome boy who I will need to communicate with in sign language which will be a challenge. The other day I will be working with Yr 1. I am so looking forward to it
Am having a fantastic weekend. Thursday I went to see Thriller Live with my friends at the Mayflower in Southampton. It was good especially when they sung the Michael Jackson songs that I know like Thriller, Billie Jean and Bad.
Last night we went to a fantastic party. My neighbour (and one of my best friends) had her 50th Birthday. She hired a hall and It was fantastic -a whole evening of great music, lots of drink and fun. Our group had the dance floor totally staked out for us. DJ was great and played all the great numbers from the 70's and 80's. We didn't want to go home. Judith is a great friend so I bought her a day out at windsor castle with a cream tea. She was thrilled and to my surprise has asked me to come with her for the day
Tonight we went out for dinner with my mum, dad, my sister and my niece. It was a really nice evening catching up as we had not seen each other for the past week. Really enjoyed the whole evening espcially seeing Amber and Christopher sharing a massive dessert.
I am excited that I have managed to get a job. My friend works as a dinner lady at the local infant school. She's just got a new job and asked me if I wanted to work the two days that she cannot do -Wednesdays and Fridays. Just one hour on the those days. This will be lovely and just enough. Unlike my previous attempt at doing this I will be contracted to do just those two days. It means i get to work with children again which is something i love. One day I will be working with a downs syndrome boy who I will need to communicate with in sign language which will be a challenge. The other day I will be working with Yr 1. I am so looking forward to it
Am having a fantastic weekend. Thursday I went to see Thriller Live with my friends at the Mayflower in Southampton. It was good especially when they sung the Michael Jackson songs that I know like Thriller, Billie Jean and Bad.
Last night we went to a fantastic party. My neighbour (and one of my best friends) had her 50th Birthday. She hired a hall and It was fantastic -a whole evening of great music, lots of drink and fun. Our group had the dance floor totally staked out for us. DJ was great and played all the great numbers from the 70's and 80's. We didn't want to go home. Judith is a great friend so I bought her a day out at windsor castle with a cream tea. She was thrilled and to my surprise has asked me to come with her for the day
Tonight we went out for dinner with my mum, dad, my sister and my niece. It was a really nice evening catching up as we had not seen each other for the past week. Really enjoyed the whole evening espcially seeing Amber and Christopher sharing a massive dessert.
Monday, 23 February 2009
End of Half Term
Chris was off school for an inset day today. We have had a lovely time together over half term last week. We've been to the cinema (three times!), to Birdworld and also to a Farm Park with Friends. Been good to go out with friends as it means someone is there to look after Chris if I had to sit down and rest. Its been lovely to spend time with Christopher. Although only 8 he looks after me so well and takes such good care of me. I feel proud but sad about this as I feel I have made him grow up quicker than normally. He knows that I cannot do as much as I used to and that i need to rest at times but we find other things to do that don't involve standing too much.
Today I went to the hospice for some complementary therapy. Having reflexology does me so much good. I can totally relax and switch off whilst having the treatment. I did manage to fall asleep only for the fire alarm to wake me up. It was only a test but felt quite groggy after it as i had fallen asleep quite heavily. When I got back home i picked up Christopher from my neighbours and me, Chris, My neighbour and her little boy walked across the field to have lunch at our local pub. A lovely end to a lovely week.
I shall miss my little man when he goes back to school. He's always got a happy smile or a thought to share to keep my spirits up and remind me how lucky I am to be his mum.
Today I went to the hospice for some complementary therapy. Having reflexology does me so much good. I can totally relax and switch off whilst having the treatment. I did manage to fall asleep only for the fire alarm to wake me up. It was only a test but felt quite groggy after it as i had fallen asleep quite heavily. When I got back home i picked up Christopher from my neighbours and me, Chris, My neighbour and her little boy walked across the field to have lunch at our local pub. A lovely end to a lovely week.
I shall miss my little man when he goes back to school. He's always got a happy smile or a thought to share to keep my spirits up and remind me how lucky I am to be his mum.
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